Ending Your Summer Romance: What to Do When It’s Time To Say Goodbye

Even if you are no longer attending school, autumn conjures up the desire for change, be it switching your hairstyle or altering your love life. So if you want a September to remember, it’s important to end that casual summer romance so you can start fresh in the fall and focus on more serious encounters.

How You Know That It’s Time to Go

The first step is to make sure that this isn’t the kind of relationship that could develop into something more rewarding down the line. Just because the two of you were together over the summer doesn’t automatically mean that the romance has a September 1st expiration date. Is this someone who you just “click” with? Do you share a unique kind of chemistry? Are your values and life goals compatible? If you’re reading this article, there’s probably a good portion of you that thinks that it’s just not going to work out for one reason or another, and sometimes that little voice in the back of your head is all you need to make your decision. That being said, it never hurts to double-check.

It’s Not You . . . Wait, Yes it Is

The next step is to pinpoint the specific reasons behind your decision to end this relationship. This will increase your confidence in your choice and help you explain to the other person exactly why it is time for the two of you to go your separate ways. Maybe you’re leaving the area and don’t want to put the effort into a long-distance relationship. Maybe you enjoy the other person’s company, but you just don’t see the two of you pursuing anything long-term. Maybe there wasn’t much chemistry there to begin with, and you realize now that you should have ended things long ago. Whatever the reasons, think them through carefully, and write them down in case you want to go over them later.

Let ‘Em Down Easy

The last step is to tell your summer fling that it is time to move on. If you’ve only been on one or two dates with this person, breaking up with them over the phone is acceptable, but beyond that it is necessary to meet with them one-on-one (and preferably in a public place for safety reasons). It is NOT okay to end a summer fling over email, text message, or instant messenger.

When the two of you meet up, don’t beat around the bush-tell them at the beginning of the interaction that you think it is time for the two of you to end things. Then explain the reasons behind your decision. You don’t need to go into extreme detail; it’s best if you are straightforward and diplomatic, and be sure to tell them how much you’ve enjoyed their company (if that is a true statement). They may be upset, but if you have been honest and up front with them, they will respect you for it down the line.